random thoughts

i wasted my day again by
sleeping, idling in front of my cpu,
waching tv, gaming, surfing websites etc.

something is wrong again in me.
everytime after some time, i'll indulge
in this so called 'hobby' and forget about myself.
forget what i should do best.
forget to do something that is beneficial.
forget to become what i suppose to become.

i read one of my fren's blog earlier,
she had a busy life, and many complains,
yet, she doesn't hate the life she's having.
me? having relax life, too relax until
sometimes i cannot differentiate when is holiday
and when is not. i hate it.
but everytime after some busy day,
i'll get back home asap to enjoy n relax myself up.
i guess we need a balance life to redeem satisfaction huh?

looking at the clock,
again, it's the time where i start thinking about myself,
my future, what am i doing, what i should do, and
what must i do tomorrow.
i duno why, everyday at this hour,
i'll be left alone in front of my cpu,
talking to myself, sometimes via my own blog,
sometimes via others' blog. pondering much.
i think it's my "private time" with myself.

i've been repeating my blog's song over n over again,
simply love it. touching, flattering, and sentimental.
they always remind me of those sad and romantic scences
of the drama. i realli love korean drama. a damn lot.
the song sometimes also, reminds me of my loneliness.
ha.. i'm lonely, isn't it?

what is happiness?
a reflect from my fren's blog saying how she
was separated from happiness, and how she
desperate for some happiness in her life.
to me she should me happi ad, but to her it's not enuff.
everyone has their own set of happiness.
some would be very happy juz by obtaining a set
of flying colours in their papers.
some would be very happy by having their
life partner around them when they are lonely.
some would be very happy when they
were given a lot of money to spend.
some would be very happy to have someone
look after and take care of them regardless
they have feelings towards them or not.
some would be happy when there are frens around them.
happiness, is a strange thing isn't it?
it's like love.
love is magic. when there is love,
everything become beautiful.
when there isn't, everything turns ugly.
it can juz be gone by a flip of finger.
who can grasp love permanently? i doubt.

actualli i have tons of assignments piling up
like mountains at my table, but i'm juz procrastinating.
i know it's so wrong, to do stuff last minute
but heck i juz can't manage them earlier.
seems like i'll be one of the laz minute kaki again
when those projects reach their due dates.

i'm hungry, tho' i juz finish eating
mash potato with cheese and a cup of hot milo.
i wanna eat dominos.....